Day 76: My Greatest Test.

When I started my 90 day adventure I hadn't really anticipated all of the things that could have gone wrong because it would have been difficult even if everything had gone right. Many things have not gone as planned and I've adapted and did my best. Currently I am suffering from a sore throat. I can't think of anything that would make my 90 day challenge more difficult then the inability to sing. The first thing usually feel when something goes wrong is frustration which leads to anger which leads to sadness which hopefully leads to surrender. Simply accepting the situation as it is. Sometimes I feel that surrender and sometimes I don't. Sometimes I get stuck in sadness and that's not a happy place with lollipops and cotton candy. It's more like cigarettes and whiskey sour. Or maybe 10 whiskey sours until I pass out.  Last night I went to the open mic at Canters. It was a comedy of errors. My main guitar is currently being fixed because of a crack so I brought my backup. Inside the guitar is a battery which allows for it to be plugged into the PA system which allows for the guitar to amplified. Since I never play this guitar I didn't check to make sure the battery was good and just my luck it wasn't. So then they miked up the guitar. It was feeding back. The gentlemen who runs the open mic then setup my microphone and left the room. So I started and the microphone stand was fallen down and my guitar was barely audible.  A friend of mine was nice enough to try and lift it up during the song. On top of that my voice sounded like Chewbacca. I was hoping it would be healed but it seems like it's going to take a few more days. I left feeling pretty fucking shitty. There is no great lesson in this post. No aha moment. Right now I am questioning whether I should continue. A few nights ago I played guitar in the Promenade. I did it late at night with very few people around. I felt I was running naked on the 405. It was humbling. I am being tested to an incredible degree. My body hurts. My mind hurts. What to do?